Friday, August 11, 2017

The Best Dating Tips for Introverts

Suffering from social anxiety or being an introvert can cause a multitude of obstacles when dating online. If we are too scared to interact with others face to face, how are we supposed to get to know someone enough to actually date them?  Dating as an introvert can sometimes feel impossible.

An introvert is typically an introvert because they don’t like to or are scared to talk to new people. The fear of putting yourself out there for someone to judge or possibly bully; the chance of being let down once again is what stops us from getting out there and meeting new people.

Dating is difficult as it is but add anxiety into the mix and it’s even tougher. We don’t want to be alone forever but we are too scared to put ourselves out there to interact with new people. This can be a huge hindrance when it comes to meeting face to face with someone from an online dating app for a first date.

How can we build a new relationship without putting ourselves out there? We can’t.

Tips For Overcoming Social Anxiety While Dating

  • Start telling yourself positive affirmations every day. Make a list of the things that you like about yourself or that you want to believe about yourself and repeat them to yourself every day and every night. Things such as: I am beautiful, I am kind, I am funny… etc.. It may sound crazy but these really work!
  • Push yourself. The only thing stopping us from getting out there is ourselves. It’s going to be a battle but if you truly want to get out there and date, you have to push yourself out of your comfort zone. Close your eyes, take a deep breath, and go for it without thinking about the “what ifs” or what could happen.
  • Psyche yourself up. Be your own coach or find a family or friend to be your coach. Tell yourself that you can do it, you are strong, and that nothing is going to stop you. Remind yourself that you will never get what you want without taking the first steps.
  • Fight off the negative thoughts. These negative thoughts are always going to pop into your head. The key is to NOT listen to them! As soon as you start to hear them, tell yourself, “NO, I’m not listening!” push these thoughts to the back and put your attention onto something else. You are in control of these thoughts, they are not in control of you.

Once you push yourself to do it, you have to keep going! If you make it through the awkward first few minutes of the initial face to face meeting, then the worst is over.  Now you need to push yourself to keep up the conversation. Don’t make the other person uncomfortable by sitting there like a lump on a log making them do all of the talking. The only way they are going to get to know the true you is by you letting your personality out of its shell. Give them a good reason to ask for a second date!

Think about this: Do you want to live as a hermit for the rest of your life? I know that I sure as Hell don’t! I also know that if I keep myself locked up in my little bubble, a hermit is exactly what I’m going to become. Alone and lonely. The only way to change that is to push myself to do things out of my comfort zone. Communication and socialization is a part of life. It’s how bonds and relationships are formed.

Stop sitting back watching the world go by. There is a humongous world out there, be a part of it! Stop letting fear hold you back and let everyone know the real you and the wonderful things that you have to offer.

Push yourself. You can stop being an introvert if you decide that it is something you really want. Dating as an introvert is hard and the only thing that is going to help the process is by you letting your guard down and being willing to let new people into your little bubble, eventually. Try these dating tips for introverts and let me know if they helped you!

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