Tuesday, October 11, 2016

Dating: Then and Now

I'm sure most of us believe that technology makes everything in life simpler. We really don't even need to leave our houses as long as we have a smart phone or tablet. I do agree, it does make things simpler in most aspects. I'm not one of those people who enjoys chit chatting on the phone for hours at a time but I can text all day long if I'm in the mood. 

When it comes to online dating, technology does make it easier in some aspects, especially for people like me who tend to be shy, and have a harder time going out and meeting new people. I can chit chat with various types of men without having to worry about if my hair is perfect or tripping over my words. I can strike up small talk to find out what we have in common and if it is worth continuing the conversation. It also makes it easier to just drop off the face of the earth or to just leave a conversation if I'm not 'feeling' it. 

Before my marriage and divorce, dating involved calling each other on the phone and going on dates, having face to face conversations while we get to know one another. I think I miss that. The fun playful flirting. No cell phone interruptions. When the date was over, you just had to wait until he called you (or vice versa).

Everything is different now. People's outlooks have changed. I'm not sure if people even "date" any longer or go on real live dates. It seems like more and more people have given up on the whole love thing and just want to hook up (one night stand) with random people that they met online and know absolutely nothing about. The few of us who are actually looking for an honest to God relationship are overlooked because we are not willing to jump into the sack with someone the day after we start chatting. The whole idea of going on a "date" has turned into Netflix and chill (and we all know what that is code for). 

When you do chat with someone for more than a few days, it turns into a game. Like ok, I haven 't heard from him in a few days but I can't text him again, I have to wait another certain amount of days. People will lead you on and pretend that they are interested in pursuing a relationship with you, while they are doing the same exact thing with 5 other people, then when they decide that they found someone more interesting or someone willing to put out quicker, they can just stop all contact and disappear as if your time, effort and deep conversations meant absolutely zilch to them. No one really truly cares any more. 

If a relationship does develop, so many people are just so quick to cheat. Everyone has a side piece, and it's no big deal because almost everyone does it. 

Dating these days is very disheartening to people like me who want a legit monogamous relationship. It is proving to be very rare to find someone wanting that same thing. Makes me wonder if real love even exists any more. 

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