Sunday, December 13, 2015

Online Dating: The First Day

Like I said in a previous post regarding online dating, a magical love story isn't going to happen over night, Hell, I'm still waiting for my true love story! Depending on how catchy your profile is, you may be bombarded with messages or you may only get a few here and there. The key to getting views and messages on dating apps is to put some effort into your profile.

First of all, make your dating profile attention grabbing... Starting with... photos. It seems so shallow to judge someone by the way they look but we all do it. Don't lie. Especially when it comes to the dating scene we are all attracted to a pretty face or a specific body type. I will admit it, I can be picky when it comes to who I talk to on dating websites but to be honest, there has to be some sort of attraction there for me to put effort into it. Although, I do have a certain type that I like more than others, I try to give everyone a fair shake.

As a woman, I know most of us are very picky about photos. We may take 100 photos and only find 3 that we like. We must have the perfect pose, look upwards to hide that double chin, make-up just perfect and hair just right...etc.. We all want to look and feel beautiful in our photos however, we also don't want to hide who we really are. For instance: you may be able to pose, twist and turn a certain way which makes you appear to be thinner than you really are, with a bigger chest than what you really have, without looking slutty or easy. It may grab attention but if things get serious and you make plans to go on a first date, you don't want your date to be shocked that you don't look much in person like what you do in your photos.  What you post publicly online is up to you and your comfort level. Myself, I will post a few different pics with various poses but only what I am comfortable with. Once I chat with someone and realize that it may turn into a first date, I may eventually send a full body pic, sort of like the final test, so that there wont be any awkward first meets. I have typically had good responses but unfortunately had a couple that suddenly stopped talking once they saw my full body pic. Yeah, it stung but I would rather it happen that way instead of having an uncomfortable meeting in person.

You will probably get some cheesy pick up lines or just some lame, "hi" messages. My advice is to look at their profile, see if you may have something in common or if there is any type of physical attraction before messaging them back.

Not Interested. Of course, you are going to get a shit ton of messages from men (or women) that you are not interested in , whether it be because they are too old or too young, or basically repulsive. Again, it is all up to you how you choose to handle the situation. Myself, I prefer to just not respond at all. Sometimes I feel bad not responding but to be honest, I just don't have the time to send a 'not interested' message to every single message I receive.  I only respond to those that I may be interested in, instead of wasting time chit chatting with someone that I have no interest in meeting up with. I feel that just not responding is the polite way of saying "not interested". Some people are offended by getting no response at all. Some also feel the opposite of how I feel and think that the right thing to do is say, "I'm sorry but, I am not interested". Again, it is all up to personal choice. Personally, I would rather get no response at all as opposed to the let down message but it is all up to you.

Headline: Most online dating websites have a spot for some sort of headline or catchy phrase. This is what you use to catch others attention, apart from photos. You can use a cute salutation, a funny quote, or even song lyrics. It's all up to you, just make sure that it is something that will catch the attention of potential suitors. It is typically the first thing people see, and a boring headline is not going to make anyone click on your profile. How about a joke? The possibilities are endless. Make your profile stick out above the rest!

True Pheromones

If someone can't take the time to fill out their online dating profile, I feel that they aren't serious about finding a date. Putting just a little effort into your dating profile can make a world of difference in who you attract. I can't tell you how many profiles I come across that just say, "I don't like talking about myself" and nothing else. Really? You can't try harder harder than that? Don't expect to get results from an empty or boring online dating profile.



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