Monday, July 16, 2018

Snowflakes: Stop Getting Offended Over Everything, Please!

It's the middle of 2018. We should have evolved by now. We aren't all riding around in flying cars yet, but guess what we do have? We have big balls of offended snowflakes who get their undies in a bunch every time someone says something that they don't agree with -- and most times it's over really stupid shit. Our ancestors would be so disappointed in what some of you have become.

This is something that has been bugging me for awhile -- the way that people get so butt hurt and offended over the smallest things. Why? What is the point of becoming offended? Why do you care so much about what other people say or do?

Myself, I don't get offended by much. I mean, you really have to be a complete douchebag asshole to offend me. Otherwise, I just live my life the way I want and don't give a second thought to what anyone else says or does.

It if doesn't affect me and doesn't hurt me or my family, why do I need to care about it?

Last week on my Instagram page, I posted a meme about how women body shame men just as much as men body shame women, for height, weight, muscle...etc.. It was a legit meme that I agreed with because women do body shame men for many reasons, but then cry if a man shames them. One of my followers made a comment to which I replied to, and then THIS happened:

This chick is seriously offended because I used the words "some females". Females. I mean -- really? And then she went on to argue with a male about the use of the word "females" and how offensive it is. Are you out of your fucking gourd? I JUST DON'T GET PEOPLE!! When did it become trendy to be offended by every stupid little thing? Because someone doesn't word something the way that you think it should be worded? Or because they said something you don't agree with, then you have to go on a tirade about it? Do people like this even realize how ridiculously idiotic it makes them look? Especially on a public forum like Instagram?

I see this kind of thing everywhere on social media. These snowflakes having a meltdown over something ridiculous like being called a female instead of a woman, so they spend hours upon hours attempting to get the other person to become "politically correct" in their eyes, or they report them and try to get their account suspended. That'll show 'em! Reporting someone over something they said that offended you is the equivalent of 5-year-oldld tattling on another kid.

The way I live my life is like this: my life, my family, my pets, my home, these are the things that matter to me the most. I don't feel that I need to waste my time throwing a temper tantrum over every little thing that I don't agree with. I keep my nose in my own business. People piss me off all the time. If I wanted to whine and cry about every single thing on social media that I don't agree with, I wouldn't have time to do anything else! I admit I do enjoy sometimes jumping into the middle of the snowflake tantrum and adding a few snarky comments here and there, but even that's minimal because I have so many better things to do with my time!!

How did we get here? What made these people so thin-skinned and bothered? Is it their parents' fault for raising these spoiled little babies to be so fragile? Do they think they are actually doing good by being whiners and complainers? What do they think they are accomplishing?

I have so many questions because I just don't get it!

Here's the thing.

There are billions of people in this country and even more in the entire world. We all have our own mind and our own opinions. It's not humanly possible for everyone to agree on everything. Just because you are going to get butthurt over someone else's opinion or even worse, how someone worded something, doesn't mean that anyone cares or that you are somehow going to get them to change their opinion. If you need to go to the cry room and cry it out, they probably have some at your local preschools. You can sit on one of those teeny little kiddie chairs and have a cry session because someone offended you.

Maybe parents should start raising their kids to have some guts again, and show them that they won't get their way by acting like little spoiled brats. Teach them to have tougher skin and that the whole world doesn't revolve around them. Parent like you mean it!

Mature grown adults don't throw temper tantrums when/if they don't get their way. You are obviously not a mature adult if you throw a hissy fit because of someone else's opinions or because they called you a female instead of a woman! Suck it up, Nancy, there are way too many more important things to worry about in this screwed up world we live in.

Do you feel the same way? Follow my Facebook page while you're here.

OFFENDED? Find Your Safe Place Snowflake! t-shirt. Click.


Monday, July 9, 2018

Parenting As An Empath with Social Anxiety

Being an introvert with social anxiety as well as being an empath can put you in a tough place. You can empathize with people, but yet you're too anxious to go around people. Dealing with these issues while being a parent causes an entirely new set of difficult issues to deal with. Only an empath parent struggling with social anxiety can understand these issues. I'm hoping this will help other parents to have an idea of what it's like to live in our world. We are not like the others.

Parenting as an empath with social anxiety

Parenting With Social Anxiety

As a parent, you want your children to be involved in different activities to broaden their knowledge and skills, while also interacting with other kids their age. As a parent with social anxiety, this can cause our own set of issues that we don't want our children to know about, so we try to grin and bear it the best that we can.

If you don't know what social anxiety is, go read this first: What They Don't Tell You About Social Anxiety to understand.

Parents with social anxiety don't like to be out in public with a bunch of strangers. It makes us nervous. It makes us feel that we are being stared at and judged by all of the other parents and teachers. It's uncomfortable. As a parent, we have to and want to support our children in everything they do including sports, band, and other activities which forces us to be in public around other judgy soccer moms. Although we may want to make excuses not to go, we want to support our kids and know that we have to suck it up and do it. We don't want to make a scene or have people stare at us so we are not the parent screaming and yelling at sporting events or cheering loudly at a band concert. We clap and show our support, but we don't want to draw attention to ourselves.

We are proud of our kids and what they are achieving, but all we can think about is that we just want to be home. Our kids don't understand and we don't talk about it much with them, they just know that we are quiet and shy and don't like talking to strangers.

Even meeting our child's friends can be difficult, especially as they get older. Are their friends judging us? Is their friend thinking, "Oh my God, her mom is so fat", are they laughing at me? Sleepovers are extremely uncomfortable. Your home is supposed to be where you feel completely 100% comfortable -- I can't feel that way if there is another person in the house that isn't family and that I don't know well. I can't wake up and walk around looking like a bum feeling like this other child is watching me or judging me. Ugh, why does social anxiety have to be so difficult?

Parenting as an Empath

Empaths are hypersensitive people who experience a high level of compassion, consideration, and understanding towards others. Their intense empathy creates a tuning fork effect, wherein the empath seems to actually "feel" the emotions of the people around them. --

Now we have even more difficulty to add to the parenting life. Being an empath means that we feel other people's mental anguish and pain. If someone else feels embarrassed or hurt, we feel it. We don't want anyone to feel that way, so we spend our lives trying to ensure that we don't hurt anyone's feelings or make anyone feel uncomfortable because we know that feeling all too well.

Empaths are some of the nicest people you will ever meet because of this same reason. We are kind to everyone because we don't ever want to hurt someone's feelings. When it comes to parenting, being an empath makes raising a child the right way more difficult. Why? Because of those wonderful times that we have to use tough love. Tough love is tough for everyone involved.

For example: my teenage daughter is being extremely rude and disrespectful. I tell her that if she doesn't straighten her shit up and stop being disrespectful and rude, she won't be going to the fun thing we have planned for the weekend. She continues her same behavior. When it comes close to time for the fun event, she puts on her sweet face, apologizing and asking if there is anything she can do to earn her right to go to the fun thing. No! As a parent, I have to stand behind my word and follow through with what I say or else she will learn that my threats are just that -- threats, and don't mean anything. As an empath, I feel for my daughter. I know she will be sad and upset when we leave her at home while we go have a fun day. She will turn on the waterworks because she knows that I have a difficult time sticking my word.

As a parent, I know I have to follow through with what I say, but sometimes it is so frickin' hard! No mother wants their child to have their feelings hurt or be sad, but I give them plenty of warnings of what will happen if they don't change their bad behavior, and as difficult as it may be, I have to force myself to follow through with everything I say to teach my children that they can't get away with acting like a brat and then still get to have fun with everyone else.

My kids know that I have a big heart. Although they may not understand what it means to be an empath, they know that I can be a pushover at times, and they use it to their own benefit, especially the older they get. I have to show them who is boss no matter how difficult it may be. I can not let them take advantage of me and I won't let them. It just hurts me sometimes when I can see in their eyes that they are holding back tears because I follow through and don't let them go do something fun because of their behavior. I admit, sometimes I do give in, and it pisses me off when I do, but if it's something I truly believe that I need to stick to, I have to force myself to be the bad guy. I know most parents struggle with this whole tough love thing, but I think it's 10 times worse when you are an empath especially as your kids get older and recognize the right buttons they can push.

Parenting is a hard job for all of us. It's never easy raising human beings and attempting to mold them into being good people, but parenting with social anxiety while being an empath can make it that much more difficult. All we can do is push through and try to do the best job that we can. We don't want to look weak to our children and we have to force ourselves to be the role model we want our kids to have, even if it means putting ourselves in uncomfortable situations.

The Shyness and Social Anxiety Workbook for Overcoming Your Fear

 Like this post? Help me out by sharing it using the buttons below.


Wednesday, June 27, 2018

Manners 101: How Not To Be A Douche Bag

Being an introvert makes me very anti-social. I don't like being around a lot of people, especially strangers. My social anxiety makes things even worse and causes me to become very uncomfortable in social settings. I really don't get out much apart from weekly grocery shopping trips and going to a few local stores throughout the week. Another reason I am so anti-social is because the majority of people are fucking idiots. The majority of society lacks basic respect and manners, and they annoy the Hell out of me. Obviously, their parents never taught them how to not be a twatface in public. Every single time I go in public, I become annoyed multiple times and more often than not, leave the store in a bad mood because of these ill-mannered people I'm forced to share air with.

Manners 101

This is why I've made a list of how NOT to be a douche bag when in public. 

Read it. Remember it. Follow it!

  1. Make your little bratty kids behave in public. Last week, I was at the grocery store and some kid who looked like he was about 10 was going around writing "Gucci" with his finger on every single refrigerated glass door that was steamed up from the humidity. He was running around yelling and acting a fool while mom was just walking around by herself, oblivious to the entire thing. I saw the two of them multiple times and didn't see her speak to him at all. Way to raise an asshole. This is something I see on a regular basis. Kids running around acting stupid with the parents paying no attention to them.
  2. Get off your phone when in public! No one, I mean NO ONE wants to hear your stupid ass conversation while waiting in line behind you or trying to grab the bread from beside you. Is it THAT difficult to say, "I"m at the store can I call you back in a few minutes?"? Unless it's a life or death situation, take that shit somewhere else.
  3. Get out of the damned way! If you see someone else coming or trying to get something that you are standing in front of, have the common decency to move out of the way or at least apologize for standing in the way. Don't turn around and look at me standing there waiting, and just turn around and keep standing there doing nothing. I don't want to be here any longer than I have to, so get the Hell out of the way! Same goes for those who just block the entire aisle so no one can get through either way, and they continue to stand there knowing that people are waiting to get through from both ways.
  4. Put some damned clothes on! I, nor my children, or the 80-year-old walking in front of me want to see your ass cheeks hanging out of your booty shorts, nor do we want to see your fat stomach hanging out of the bottom of your shirt. (Not fat shaming, I'm fat, too, but I make sure my rolls are covered up!). There are going to be kids of all ages in these types of public places, show some respect and try not to dress like a hooker on vacation.
  5. If you absolutely have to bring all TEN of your children with you, at least keep them in check. Teach them manners and how to stay out of others' way. It's bad enough that you have to bring every single one of them with you, but make sure they don't annoy other customers. And if you don't have to bring them all, leave some of them at home so they aren't in everyone else's way!
  6. Be polite! If you accidently bump into someone, say sorry. If you notice that you are in someone's way, apologize and then move so that they can get through. An "excuse me" or "sorry" can go a long way. Don't bump into someone and then give them a dirty look!! Don't stand in someone's way and then act like you don't see them or that you don't give a shit.
  7. Don't yell or talk to your kids at the top of your lungs throughout the entire store. There is no reason to talk that loud! If I can hear you yelling at your kids three aisles over, you need to lower your damned voice and teach your kids to listen better. Even if you're not necessarily yelling at your kids, there's no reason to continually talk to them in such a loud tone that the entire store can hear it unless you have a hearing problem. I don't want to hear your loud annoying voice every two minutes. Shut the fuck up!

Seriously people, don't be a douche bag! What you do in your home is one thing, but when you are in public, carry yourself with a bit of respect and show it to others. Everyone is on a mission, we all have shit to do, don't make it more difficult than it has to be.

Be a good role model to your kids and teach them these basic manners and respect, so that they don't end up being the douche bags of the future. I don't want to deal with idiots. I try to stay far away from them, but going out in public makes that nearly impossible. Don't be that idiot. If you do any of the above things on the manners list, make a conscious effort to not be a douche bag. Please. Otherwise, you just look like an asshole. 

Be sure to share the knowledge below!!

I Am Surrounded by Fucking Idiots t-shirt. Get it here.